I know I’ve all but abandoned you, tumblr world but I’ve been reading Bad Feminist at the same time as planning a trip and feel revamped with material.
Today a middle school friend of mine announced on Facebook that she is expecting a child with her long-time boyfriend. Having just seen her excitement over having enrolled in school not having previously finished her Bachelor’s Degree, my first reaction was shock and disappointment rather than happiness.
Don’t get me wrong, if this is what she wants (and it would appear that is the case) then I am ecstatic for her. But my mind first went to the feminist movement. Here she was about to become a student again and suddenly decides that she can handle that alongside a baby? Why do women do this? Why do they suddenly think that one baby step forward is enough for their future and their movement and decide to take a baby step back as to how women as a whole are viewed?
I can’t put the blame or perception of all women on this one Facebook friend’s shoulders, obviously. But now I see her as a trend, a statistic, a stereotype. She’s the female society views as requiring motherhood to function instead of leaning in to her career - and she’s my age (early 20s)!!!
I know, I know: to each his/her own. And it’s not as though I’m the ideal picture of feminism either. But I truly do hope that she and people like her DON’T become the stereotype I picture in my head. I hope that more men Lean In to child care so that women like her can finish their degrees. I hope that the workplace doesn’t view her first as a mother or even as a female but rather as a worker.
I hope this for all future generations.